“So then what did they say?” I asked R, turning towards him while we both lay in bed ignoring the ten o’clock news.
R had refused the position in El Paso. I wasn’t sure how much he actually wanted to refuse on his own merit, but he was able to see the logic in my argument that it was unwise for us to move right now. Between the baby on the way and Z just gaining footing here, it just seemed crazy to go chasing after another job with this company that couldn’t seem to make up it’s mind.
“They told me that they understood, but unfortunately, that means I need to find another job.”
I replayed the sentence I’d just heard in my head before responding, “What? How do they go from offering you one job to telling you that you’re fired?”
“Well, apparently what they really meant by offering me this position in El Paso was that they were moving the job I currently have to El Paso, whether or not I wanted to go. Meaning, if I say no to going, then they will fill my position with someone else who will go to El Paso.”
I gulped. “That’s not good.”
R sighed in the flickering dim from the television set. “No, it isn’t.”
“Do you want to go back and say yes?” I couldn’t even imagine it. With all of the back and forth about this job business it was now early December. Moving at this stage would put me between 7 and 8 months by the time we moved. It seemed crazy, but it wasn’t like losing your job before having a baby was a great choice either.
“No,” R said firmly. “At this point I’m frankly a little irritated with them. Don’t worry, they said I can stay on until after the baby is born.”
Somehow, that news didn’t really make me feel any better. “Well, what are you going to do?”
“I can look internally within the company for a job. Which is what I will do.”
“Are there any jobs here?” I asked hopefully.
“No. There aren’t any jobs for someone with my skill set, at my level here. We’ll definitely have to move. It’s just a matter of when, and where to.”
“What do you think the options are?” I asked, my voice tinged with doubt. “Will you go back to Wisconsin?”
“It might be a possibility, but the company has a lot of subsidiaries. There’s stuff all over. I’ll start putting out feelers and we’ll see what sticks.” R looked at me, my brows tight with worry. “Look, you can’t freak out about this. It’s not good for the baby, or for you. It’ll be fine. I’m not worried at all. It’s not like you love it here, anyway.”
I nodded. “That’s true. It wouldn’t break my heart to leave here, maybe move back somewhere closer to family. But I just hate to uproot Z so quickly; he really does like it here.”
R was silent for a moment next to me. “We’ll figure it out. It’ll be OK. I promise.” He leaned in to softly kiss my mouth.
I kissed back, trying to not let my worry, still so close to the surface, show.